So a couple of weeks ago we received a letter asking us to go to a weekend camp that focuses on children that have lost a sibling that was treated at Cooks. We thought it might be a good idea to try it out and see how things go.
On May 11th was the 1st day of the camp. Cook Children's was hosting Camp Morning Star at Camp John Marc in Meridian, TX. We really did not know what to expect, but we were all willing to give it a try and hoped to meet a lot of great people who are in the same unfortunate position as us. When we first arrived, we got a map to our cabin, unloaded, and then headed to the dining area for a overiew of what the weekend had in store for us. We ate dinner, which they served us, and soon after they started passing out candles. We cut out the pictures that we brought of Lauren and then pasted the one we liked the most onto the candle. From there, everyone walked out to a large firepit area. There was a couple more speaches, poems, sayings, which were all talking about how our children are the light in our lifes and even though they are gone, their light does not fade, it still shines. So on that note, individually each family came to the front, lit their candle, and said their child's name. After they did, the group would say "Their light shines in the darkness". The night ended with a series of campfire songs and stories. You could just see the happiness on all the children's faces. We found our way back to the cabin and enjoyed the rest of the night as a family before the next morning.
May 12th started off very early. At 8:00AM we were already eating breakfast. At the table, we had some of the volunteers sitting with us. During breakfast they asked us about Lauren, and we got to tell them how beautiful she was. Right after breakfast, we were off to activity #1. At the beginning of camp, each family got to choose 4 different acitivities they would like to participate in. For Brandon, Halley, and I, activity #1 was fishing! We were with about 4 different families fishing and it was a nice, relaxing, fun activity. After fishing was done, we were headed to activity #2. For oue 2nd acitivy, we chose arts & crafts, We were all able to do whatever we were wanting to while we were in there. Halley chose to paint a picture of our family on a frame, Brandon chose to cut crayons, melt them, and make a paper frame around it, and I chose to color on sandpaper and then iron it onto paper to make a transfered picture.
Once we were done with arts & crafts, we had to meet everyone near the dining area so we could all break out into smaller groups. Dads were headed to "the giant swing". This is similar to the sky coasters you would see at six flags, but on a little smaller scale. My husband was expecting to maybe talk or something like that, but was in for a major surprise when he was up in the air! He said he put himself 2nd to last because he was hoping they would run out of time. The moms went to a pottery painting area. We each got a bowl, several colors of paint, and just had time to make whatever we wanted. The children had a couple of different activities. They gave them white balloons and makers. They were able to draw on them or write whatever they wanted - just to express themselves and talk about their sibling that they lost - then they all shared with the groups about their sibling. After that, they were able to make cute little windchimes! Right about noon, we were all reunited and got to enjoy lunch.
After lunch, pool time was scheduled! Halley was so excited for pool time, even though it was not really hot on this day. Actually, none of the children seemed to mind the freezing water. I was smart enough to just sit beside the pool, but Brandon went in with Halley. We didn't stay at the pool for the entire time given because of the cool weather, but we also wanted to rest a little bit as well. At 3:00PM it was time for another breakout session. This time the kids went off to play some games and the adults came together to talk. Everyone was able to go around the room, talk about their children, and we were given a homework acitivty to make a family chain remembering Lauren. After we were given our assignment, we were off to acitivty #3 which involved sports and games. We had a blast! - that is the only way to describe it. For activity #4, we had to climb up a rockwall and then zip line back to the bottom. It was a very challenging course, but it was very rewarding to complete it!
At 6:45PM we were done with our 4 acitivities for the day and it was dinner time....well for the children! The adults had some alone time outside and had a few snacks. The children went inside to enjoy their dinner and then split into 2 groups. The older children went to the giant swing, and the smaller children, including Halley, went to make home made ice cream, cookies, and then play some more games. Then it was the parent's date night. They had the tables put together, table clothes, flowers on the tables, chocolate covered strawberries on the table, they sat us down, and they were serving us. We got to enjoy great coversation with a few families. At about 9:00PM the parent's dinner was over and it was time to rejoin to the children. Halley was so sweet and saved her ice cream to share with us and saved a cookie too! Then we had another group project. Each family got a canvas, got to choose supplies from a table, and then create our own family portrait. It was such a sweet moment to enjoy with them, to create a picture of love around Lauren. Then as people came around, Halley got to tell them about her baby sister. Soon after, they gave us a little paper boat. We were to write a family wish inside of the boat. Then we walked down to the lake, around another campfire. The children sang songs and the parents went to the boat dock to light candles inside the boats and set them asail in the water. Once we set them into the water, we walked back to where the children were. We listened to them sing, watched the flickering lights of the boats, and just felt a peace take over us. After a while of watching them sail away, it was time to head back to the cabin and get some sleep after a long day!
The amazing weekend was coming to an end, but we still had somethings planned. We loaded the car and then started working on our memory chain. We wrote our favorite memories of Lauren: Which were when she would hold our fingers or open her eyes to look at us. Then we wrote what we thought she would like most about the camp we were at: Which were Fishing, playing with kids, campfires, and smores. Next we wrote what animal we thought Lauren would be: We chose a butterfly because they are pretty and free. On the next series of chains, we wrote something that describes her with each letter of her name. L: Loveable, A: Angel, U: Unbelieveably Beautiful, R: Right in our hearts, E: Encourages Hope, N: Never Forgotten. One our last chain, Halley drew a picture of all four of us.
Once we were done with creating our chain, we enjoyed a Mother's Day brunch. Then the children went off to play sports and games, while the parents got to speak with the child life specialists that spent the weekend with our children. We got to hear everything they did, how the boys and girls differ, things we can do to help them deal with their grief, and also ask any questions. Again, we were reunited with the children when we met at the closing remembrance ceremony.
Overall, it was a beautiful weekend, one in which we learned so much - more than we had originally thought when the weekend began. Halley was so excited even when it was finished and can't wait to attend next year. We were also told that Cook Children's will pay for Halley to attend another camp which would be a week long. This is another camp where children lost someone in their lives. They said that this camp is only 10% like grief counseling and 90% real camp which includes swimming, horse back riding, arts and crafts etc. We think it was very beneficial for Halley to be around other children who have experienced a loss and have that common bond with, so we will definitely let her attend this week long camp and see what she gains from it. I became even more thankful of Cooks after this weekend. They took the best care of Lauren while she was there, then paid our expense at this weekend camp, and is now paying for Halley for the week long camp as well. They are doing this to really help Halley, so she knows there are other children that know her pain, and so she can grow stronger and know that it is okay to remember Lauren and there will always be someone that understands. They also do sib shops that help children with bearevement through arts and crafts. We haven't been able to attend one of these yets, but we are going to try in the future.
