As of now, I'm still struggling with my grief. I was hit with depression.. Hard. I think just recently, maybe 6 months ago, it started to get better for me. I still have heavy waves of grief that come, but I can tell a difference from a few months after she passed & now. I still think of her every day, but now I'm able to smile sometimes. Before it was completely fake and I just did it to look normal, now I can confidently say I have good days. Now I can look at her pictures and small amount of belongings & it not be like a sharp knife to the heart. I'm thankful it has started to change. I'm glad I can talk about her without bawling my eyes out.. That way people know I'm okay talking about her! I think I've struggled with explaining to people I'm not the same person as I was before Lauren died. Now that the heavy grief is a little lighter, I think I can begin to work on finding myself and loving myself again.
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